Initially, I thought bird watching would be great for my Physical Fitness Plan. As you may have gleaned from my somewhat cerebral upbringing, I certainly didn’t grow up as Sporty Spice. What this means, however, is that I’m always on the lookout for a sport that I’ll be able to engage with. Seriously. I don’t just want any sport — I want something that will challenge me, inspire me, enthral me, captivate me; I want the Sport to End All Sports.
Needless to say, this also explains why I don’t exercise all that much. I mean, I sport-shop all the time: I’ve had brief affairs with the Elliptical machine, the rowing machine, the treadmill (a very brief fling; we didn’t really speak to one another afterwards), the Pilates class (on-again, off-again type of affair, on-going), Yoga (a “distance makes the heart grow fonder” type of affair; yoga is always better in the future-perfect tense, a “would-have-been” type of sport for me), aerobics class (the “wish I never went there” kind of affair), swimming (I think we’re still on, actually), cheerleading (yes, believe it or not, 2 weeks in 9th grade), badminton (yes, YES, YES an “i’m available anytime” kind of thing), and now NIA (a nifty newageish cardio workout that I quite like, even though it feels like I’m one of the dancers during the trance scene in AVATAR — no, we don’t wear blue).
Nothing has really stuck. I thought birding could offer me not only intellectual stimulation (which it does — you try remembering all those species!) but also some sort of ideal, preternaturally astonishing Physical Fitness. I thought it would be the answer to all my sport searching woes.
Well, little did I know that there is such a thing as Warbler Neck. (The photo comes from here.)
Have you ever tried standing in that position for an hour? Let me tell you, your neck will certainly be letting you know how it feels the next morning! Turns out birding isn’t exactly fabulous for your posture or your neck muscles. I initially thought birding would be a very Zen-like activity, and there’s nothing ZEN-ish about warbler neck (otherwise known as WN in the bird world), that’s for sure. Apparently, morel mushrooms are a “God given cure” to this ailment that affects all birders alike. Who knew? If only I knew how to roam around in the woods and distinguish awesome, WN-curing mushrooms from poisonous ones, I’d be all set.